Deeper than words

I think I liked it better, when we argued on a non-stop basis,
Until our faces were blue, and eyes red, and vocies hoarse

I loved it even more, when we were little, and we played,
and you actually liked me, and I adored you

I'll be damned if I can remember the last time we had a conversation,
I mean, a meaningful one, that wasn't painful and awkward,
or just painfully awkward

I'd love to say it's just the way people grow apart, but I can't help but think
I pushed in a way that made you forcfully grow away from me

I'd personally like to stand up and apoligize for any bottons I pushed,
that were not meant to be pushed,

and any annoyance I caused, that caused you to hate me so much,
that you don't even tell me happy birthday when I turn fifteen

Doesn't it make you sad, that you probably could even guess if asked,
My favorite color, I wouldn't be surprised if you didn't even know my age

I know I liked it better when we argued, not even the meanest words could cut as deep,
as the sharp knife of silence that has plauged are relationship for years